04/01/99
Pre-Flight

So we head for Chicago tomorrow. It's a half-impulsive trip, but it should be fun. Sonya and I have never flown together before, so this will be a whole new thing. We're going to be such tourists. Maybe a Bulls game, do some clubbing, do some shopping, see a concert...it'll be fun. Thanks to Ann and Siobhan for all their help and suggestions. It's always good to have friends on the inside.




Have you seen In and Out, the Kevin Kline homosexual comedy? In it, Joan Cusack has lost a great deal of weight to prepare for her wedding to the closeted Kline. She tells Matt Dillon, a former student of hers, that at one time she was "fat." It's the way she says it, though.

"Faaaye-ut," she says.

So the other night Sonya and I were driving through Overton Square and we pass Yosemite Sam's, a dive at the corner of Cooper and Madison. The sign out front said

16% T-Bone Steak
Bake Pot
Salad

"A sixteen percent steak?" I said incredulously, "what is the other eighty-four percent made of?"

On cue, Sonya said, "faaaye-ut."

I lost it. Maybe you had to be there.




The Williams Family is a Bunch of Dorks Dept.: The same night mentioned above Sonya and I were at the mall. We were in a video store when Sonya started calling me frantically.

"Come look come look come look!" she said, grinning manically.

There, on one of the bottom shelves, was an entire row of Mystery Science Theater 3000 videotapes! Of course we purchased some. Two entire movies, a blooper reel and a tape made up entirely of shorts. It is so fuckin' funny, y'all. One of the shorts is from the '50s and purports to show why girls should major in home economics at Iowa State. This was a favorite of my circle of friends in college. My friend, Jerry-Ann, actually majored in home economics. She saw it and I've never seen someone laugh so hard in all my life.




I just fetched a beer out of the refrigerator. Last Friday, while buying groceries, I got some ground beef. It has gone uneaten, and now it has a distinctly unhealthy grayish pallor. I'm not eatin' it.




One of the radio stations here in town played an April Fool's prank today. All day long they've played disco music. Now this is cool with me - disco is far better than the bloodless VH1-lite crapola they usually play - but they've done this for the last several years. It's hardly a novelty anymore. I turned the radio in my truck on this morning and went straight to this station, knowing I'd hear some bootie-shakin' tunes.

So another station copy-catted that today, replacing its alternative stuff with rock and roll from the fifties and sixties. I wish they'd change permanently too. Alternative is one thing, but when it's the same thirty songs played over and over again, well...and alternative to what, exactly? The shit you don't hear constantly on the radio?

Anyway...you need me this weekend, I'll be in the Windy City.





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