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what is happiness I really really need this vacation and I can't stress that enough. Each day at work is starting to seem exactly like the one before it and that is not healthy. To put it another way most of the month of June has been a blur for me and not in a positive sense either. Somehow my daily activity has shrunk down to little more than three categories. I eat, drive to work and come back home again to repeat the process. This is not the way that I want it to be. I keep telling myself that I am doing this for the trip, but these last two weeks had better go by fast before I get completely numb to everything around me. Hopefully by going to Europe, I'll be able to make myself feel alive again. What makes me feel even worse is the way that everyone at work doesn't seem to mind what I see as monotony. They just keep on doing what they are doing and none of it seems to phase them. I'm not asking for them to complain on a daily basis, because that would probably add to my misery, but at the same time I have no idea how they make it through the day. To me they just seem to be on the proverbial treadmill and are going nowhere. Of course this might be just another sign that I am in dire need of a vacation. ... Over the years I have come to the conclusion that people only have a handful of conversations at their disposal and they merely cycle through them every so often. What I mean is that people very seldom stray from topics that interest them and the occasional hot news story don't count either. I'm not asking for people to care about everything or to have a new topic all of the time, but I find it odd when people steer a conversation into a certain direction. It just doesn't make sense to me and more often than not it leaves me incredibly bored. Hearing the same stories from people at work is not the way to keep my interest. Maybe all of this makes me sound like an ass, but I need to expand my shrinking social world, because I truly feel like I am living in a vacuum. ... Nicole and I had our usual amount of fun at work and I am willing to bet that I probably get more out of it than she does. Just being around her is fun and there is something about her that I truly adore. I know that all of this sounds like gushing on my part, but quite honestly she is my favorite person to work with in the department and I won't hide that fact. Some people see her as being slightly vulgar, but I see that as being real. She says what she wants to say and that is fine with me. Over and over I tease her by saying that I would love to have a calendar of the silly faces that she makes and she definitely plays this up for me. For example when she's on the phone she'll look over at me and give me one of her classic looks. Then other times she'll sashay down the hall for me with her ponytail bouncing like mad. Part of me is tempted to get one of those I-Zone Pocket cameras, because it would be a perfect gift for her. Naturally this is meant for the teen market, but she has that quirky quality about her that would probably appreciate it and I know that I would get a kick out of it too. Another trait of hers that I like is the way that she talks with me. From my experience women generally talk with men in one of two ways. Either they keep things at a very impersonal level or they go the other direction and complain about their husbands and boyfriends to the point of being annoying. Nicole doesn't do this very often and it makes talking with her that much more pleasant. Whenever we talk, she not only keeps my attention, but she also varies the topics. One minute she'll be giving me her opinion on giving birth and how some women exaggerate the pain involved and then the next minute she'll be telling me that she wants to buy a pet dragon.
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