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shifting of responsibilities Slightly after one this morning, I emailed a copy of my final paper to my professor and that was the end of my work for the semester. With the click of the mouse I found myself left with some mixed emotions. On the one hand it felt great to have finished something that had meaning to me, but I also felt slightly lost. What had taken so much of my time for the past four months was suddenly over. Then I thought some more about it and realized that I was getting too melodramatic agaain. There isn't any real reason to get too sad, because it'll all start up again in just a few weeks. In fact my bill for next semester came in the mail on Tuesday. The cycle continues. One thing ends and something else begins. ... Most of last night was spent listening to my counterpart at work talk about the department and what he plans to do next year. This isn't a new conversation. Actually we seem to have it every few weeks or so or whenever things get really slow at work. Apparently he is getting frustrated and I can sympathize with him. Work isn't that fast paced of an environment even though management likes to tell a different story. We also both know that things will probably be different in six months and either one of us might be gone by then. ... For me nothing is fixed. Oh, I have certain plans made here and there, but I have never been one to have everything mapped out too far in advance. Five years ago I would never have guessed that I would be where I am in life now. Nor do I think that I could accurately say where I'll be five years from now. All that I can do is keep trying to do what I think is best for me. Personally I think that that is the best that anyone can do. I'm not saying that I haven't made mistakes along the way, but I could have done far worse. ... Now that I look back at what I wrote above, I would have to say that most of it is rather vague. I guess that what I was trying to say is that people often look to me for answers or at the very least like to vent to me. Almost everyone in my department has complained to me at one time or another. I don't mind, but at the same time I don't think that I'll be able to solve their problems for them nor do I want to try. Maybe that sounds harsh, but I can't lead their lives for them. Besides I think that trying to keep everything straight in my own life is enough to keep me busy. Perhaps this explains why I haven't dated someone in a long time. Whenever I start seeing someone my problems seem to multiply and I often wonder whether or not women realize how much stress that they add to their boyfriends or husbands lives. Yes, I suppose that one could argue that I just keep dating the wrong women, but at the same time I do like to keep my life as uncomplicated as possible. ... I'm not sure why I am sounding so serious today. In fact it is bothering me so much that I feel the need to rattle on about some pop culture news. I taped last week's episode of Saturday Night Live just so that I could see U2 perform. After seeing it, all that I wanted to know was why did they bother to do it. As much as I like the band, I don't think that that is their target audience and I almost felt sad for them. Bono just wasn't geting that much of a response from the crowd. The other piece of fluff news that I find intriguing is young Prince William, the boy who would be king, doing volunteer work in South America. In Shakespearean terms, here we have young Hal blending in with the common people before he has to make the transformation into Henry V. Personally I find this approach to quasi government far more interesting than the mess that has been happening here in the United States.
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