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something said wrong Last night when I was talking with my old friend from high school, I had to tease him about owning a mini van. It seems that he had held off as long as possible before buying one, but had finally caved in last year. Oh, I can understand the practicality of having one when there are small children to haul around, but owning one is a definite marker in life. One can not look hip and young while driving a mini van. Those concepts do not go together despite any advertising schemes to the contrary. ... Before I fell asleep last night I saw an episode of Nova that focused on the flooding of Venice. Since I've been there seeing various parts of the city underwater actually meant something to me. Obviously this is nothing new for the people that live there, they just can't decide what is the best way to deal with the problem. ... As I had promised myself, I spoke with her today. It wasn't quite as I had imagined it to be, but I did and should probably be satisfied with that part of the equation. As for the rest of what happened between us, I can't quite judge the results. Here are the details. She was about to walk out of class so I lightly touched her on the arm and said that I wanted to ask her something to which she responded okay with a slightly surprised look on her face. Once we were outside and beyond the hearing of the professor, I asked her why she had taken the class, because to me she often seems bored. I had thought that it was a simple question with no overt qualities to it or better yet it was a step up from talking about the weather. I mean it was something that we both had in common and would be easy to answer. Her reaction, however, made me think differently. She laughed a little and said that she really wasn't that bored and hesitated before she spoke again. I was waiting for the answer as to why she had signed up for the class and she didn't seem to know what to say to me. Panic in both of us started to take effect. Here what I had thought was a great conversation starter sent her into a mild amount of confusion and I had no idea why. It wasn't as though I had asked her what she thought was the meaning of life. Nor did I think that my question was that probing. Sigh. Confusing her was definitely not the effect that I wanted and now I wonder what her reaction to me will be when I see her again on Tuesday. Will she avoid me for the rest of the semester? Will she attempt to start a different conversation? Did I simply catch her at a bad moment? Does she now think of me as a freak? Was I too forward? Is she that shy? I mean I don't think that I have heard her ask one question or give an answer in class all semester. Not only did I manage to confuser her, I managed to confuse myself. I had no idea what had gone wrong and her stepping into the bathroom to end our awkward conversation didn't make me feel that much better either. Instead of getting to know her better, I now have more questions and may have driven her away at the same time. Naturally this bothered me for the rest of the day. |