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eccentric older brother Socializing on a Sunday afternoon is always a struggle for me, but I do the best that I can. On the one hand I want to get as much out of my weekend as possible. On the other hand all that I want to do when noon rolls around is go to sleep like I did the previous five days. While I was visiting yesterday afternoon I got to see the car that Trevor bought and is working so hard to pay off in one year. I think that he made a good purchase and it certainly puts his last car to shame. His old car was slowly dying on him and this was definitely something that he needed. As for trying to get the car paid off in a year, there is a good reason behind it. Trevor plans on being in graduate school next fall and may not have any real source of income beyond what the national guard gives him. I'm not sure why I keep stressing the differences between my siblings and myself. Maybe I have some unresolved sibling rivalry issues. I try not to think of us as competing for attention, but maybe we still do at some level. Maybe once the four of us get in close proximity of our parents we regress. I don't really know what the answer might be. Nor do I know if my siblings feel the same way that I do. I've never asked them. It isn't as though we all chose the same path where comparisons would be frequent and easy. Each of us has their own personal agenda in life with very little influence from one another. Besides if my brother and sisters were exact copies of me I think that I would be very disappointed. They should do whatever is right for them. I just find it odd that they are so much more focused than I was when I was their age. After having fallen asleep on the livingroom floor at seven in the evening, I woke hours before sunrise full of energy. It's in the early morning hours of the day that I feel the most alive. I seem to be able to think better at that time of the day. There are less distractions. While other people are sleeping I can get a better start on the day. Instead of seeing the sun in the eastern sky it was the morning star that greeted me as I stepped outside into the chill air. Part of me wondered whether it was Venus or Mercury, but I didn't know. The hidden sun illuminated the edge of the horizon with sunrise still half an hour away. Frost covered the ground and I was a little disappointed that no one had bothered to roll the window of my car up for me while I slept. It took six or seven trips to load my car with a portion of my National Geographic collection. My mom needed space in her bookcase and returning my collection seemed like the easiest solution. Soon on I was the road with my backseat full of golden edged magazines. While other people were in a hurry to start their first day back at work, I could take my time and watch the sunrise as I drove home. It was the best part of the day for me.
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