Track listing and observations on the new compilation CD, What the kids like.

Hardy Boyz Theme - I'm not even ashamed of being a wrestling fan anymore. It's all out there in the open. Shit, I'm from Memphis. I think I either have to like wrestling or NASCAR, right? I'll happily take wrestling. Anyway, it's a peppy, exciting first track - if a bit repetitive. But it is a CD, right? Skip that track if you don't like it!

Tenacious D, Fuck Her Gently - "You don't always have to fuck her hard/In fact sometimes that's not right..." The charisma of Jack Black actually makes this song kind of sweet. Howlingly funny, of course.

Wheatus, A Little Respect - Yes, the Erasure song, which is one of the greatest songs ever anyway. This version's really good, too - the singer for Wheatus has the range to make this sound good. And you know the little piano solo before the end of the song? Wheatus does it with a guitar. Neat!

The Strokes, Last Nite - They just sound like a New York band, don't they? And, in the opinion of the Williams Family, they're kind of like T Rex if T Rex had come around in the early eighties. From me and Sonya that's high praise. Casablancas sounds so weary here, like he's tired of all the hype and just wants to fuckin' rock. So they do.

Britney Spears, I'm A Slave 2 U (Thunderpuss Remix) - Do you think Britney's trying to grow up a little bit? She's playing to the sexual fantasies of the vast majority of men and borrowing not only Prince's trademark spelling but a sample from one of his songs. I don't care for the original version of this song, but the Thunderpuss crew always does good work. This isn't the dance song I wanted, though. I really wanted the Deja Vu cover of Stay that's hot in the clubs right now, but I couldn't find it for free on the internet so you'll get Britney and you'll like it.

Rob Zombie, Never Gonna Stop - This fuckin' rocks. Rob may be my dad. Wrestling fan alert: this has the little "you think you know me" sound clip at the beginning.

Daft Punk, One More Time - Place your hands above your head. Wave them in an unconcerned manner. This is the spiritual offspring of Kool and the Gang's Celebration.

Eve featuring Gwen Stefani, Let Me Blow Ya Mind - I can't resist the slinky little guitar sample that makes this song go. The language is surprisingly strong, too, if all you've heard is the edited-for-radio version.

Kylie Minogue, Can't Get You Out Of My Head - Damn, she's hot. The song lives up to its name, too: hear it twice and you'll be humming the motherfucker.

Sum 41, Fat Lip - Snotty punk-pop, made by actual snotty teenagers. Totally irresistable, especially to people who grew up in the eighties as fans of both the Beastie Boys and hair metal. "Heavy metal and mullets is how we were raised." Amen, little brother.

No Doubt, Hey Baby - The way Gwen says, "hey, baby" at the beginning of this track makes me want to get down on the floor and wiggle for a while.  I'm going to marry Gwen when I grow up. This is cool with Sonya, because I think she's going to marry Gavin Rossdale when she grows up - no one will be left unhappy! 

Creed, My Sacrifice - I usually don't like Creed - they're a somber, humorless rock band, and that doesn't fly with me. But this tune...this is pure, grand, fist-raising arena rock. Bad Company, wherever they are, must be proud. The little guitar riff at the beginning gives me chills, for God's sake.

Pink, Get The Party Started - Pink has shed her gangsta trappings from earlier in her career. This is refreshing, considering the way some girls (Mariah Carey and, lately, Jennifer Lopez come to mind) can't wait to drape themselves in hip-hop regalia. If it's late at night and you're drunk you will dance to this.

Me First and the Gimme Gimmes, Country Roads - Yeah, the John Denver song. I loved John Denver when I was a kid. My sisters had his records and I'd listen to them over and over again. I really liked Sunshine On My Shoulders, but this one's pretty good, too. And it's all punked out here, so it's worth it for the smiles of recognition people will get when they realize what it is.

Shakira, Whenever, Wherever - I like her voice, especially the way she says "near" and "dear." I don't know what it is, exactly, though I've heard she doesn't speak much English and she had to record most of this album phonetically. Maybe that's it.

Ludacris, Area Codes - He says "bee-atch!" a lot. And it references Bishop Don "Magic" Juan. The Bishop used to be a pimp. Now he's a preacher and the author of an autobiography, From Pimpstick To Pulpit. Any song that mentions him should win a Grammy.

Saliva, Your Disease - Memphis rock! Hell yeah!

Lemon Jelly, The Staunton Lick - A calm, happy, end of the night number.