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norah jones sang I wish that I could better describe my attraction to Nicole than I do here. First of all it isn't all physical, but that element certainly exists. I guess the best way to put it is that I don't feel as though I have to distance myself when I am with her. I can be me and not think anything of it. In the past with some of my girlfriends there was always a feeling of what does she expect from me now. I kept wondering if I was supposed to do and or say something to keep her happy. I don't have that feeling when I'm with Nicole. The two of us can just talk and be us. Sometimes we flirt, but usually we just trade stories about our lives and how we see the world. Maybe that level of comfort would change and or disappear if we had sex, but since that isn't going to happen any time soon I'll just have to keep wondering. I suppose what this means to me is that I was with the wrong women and if I do want to be someone again it should be someone like Nicole or I won't be happy for long. I can't and won't be something other than myself to make someone else happy. ... A couple of years ago, a slightly different kind of movie theater was opened up here in Milwaukee. Instead of having stadium seating or even regular theater seats, the owner decided to tear that kind of seating out and replaced them with love seats and couches. In addition to the less formal seating, the movie theater also serves food and alcoholic drinks. When it first opened I kept telling myself that I was to go there at least once and check it out. At the time it was within easy walking distance from where I lived, but I never got around to doing it. Well, that changed last night, since that was where Jen and I decided to go see a movie after we had finished eating dinner. Now that I've been there I can definitely see the appeal of the place. Being able to stretch out and watch a movie at the same time is very relaxing. Plus the more intimate quality of the love seats makes it seem more like a friends house than a public setting. Jen wants to go back to see a showing of the Dark Side of Oz, where they play the Wizard of Oz with Pink Floyd's Dark Side of the Moon as the soundtrack. It sounds like a great time except that they only do this at midnight on Saturdays. Sigh. Maybe I can work something out with the second shift crew at work and come in late one Saturday night so that I can see it. ... Both on the way there and on the way back from the theater, Jen and I saw a deer standing by the side of the road. Even though we were driving through a park, it was still somewhat of a surprise. The deer didn't seem to mind that we were there and casually walked back into the trees. The first time that we saw the deer, it was alone, but on the return journey there was a small fox standing about ten feet away from it. This odd pairing caused Jen to coo more than once and I must admit that it had an odd Disney quality to it. I kept asking her if she saw Thumper sitting nearby. ... Jen and I had a good time last night, but things slowed down today and that was exactly what I wanted. A feeling of calm had found me when I left work Sunday morning and that same feeling came back to me today so that I could enjoy it again. I guess that I vaguely knew that today was a holiday, but that didn't mean any big plans. There weren't any family gatherings to attend nor did I have any other social obligations to meet. The day was completely mine to do with as I pleased. This freedom translated into me listening to music and reading with little concern for anything else. In the world of music, Norah Jones is my latest find. Since I like Diana Krall, I had been told by various people that I'd probably like Norah and now that I've heard her sing, I have to say that they were right. The song Feeling the Same Way was played multiple times in the afternoon. Musicians fascinate me or at least what they can do interests me. I myself have no musical talent and often wonder what kind of process allows people to create music. California Dan is the only close friend of mine that plays music on a regular basis, but I've never really asked him what he gets from the experience. Obviously he must get something from it or he wouldn't have created an album of his own.
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