Sunday Script

Brenda had to work today, so I got to have some time by myself this afternoon. Most of it was spent paying bills while The Night of the Iguana played on the television. Its one of a couple of Tennessee Williams plays that I have on video. The other two that I own are Cat on a Hot Tin Roof and Suddenly Last Summer.

Something about those old films really appeals to me. Its probably the dialogue that draws me to these films. There is a certain cadence or pattern to the speech that speaks to me. Maybe its the actor inside of me that enjoys the words so much. There are times where I think that I would make a very good over the top Shakespearean actor. I would be Hamlet in a heartbeat. Of course the crowd would have to be hidden in the dark in order for me to do the play. Even under those conditions I would probably pass out from the strain of being on stage under the lights. Or maybe I would just forget the lines entirely and start rambling about something else.

Sometimes I see life as a play and I get upset with people when they don't follow the script that I have in my head. I can generally guess what the people at work are going to say though. They seem to keep to the same routine day after day and there is very little improvisation as far as I can see.

Brenda is still amazed at me when I watch movies. Whenever I watch something, I am very critical. Everything gets filtered through how I see the world. I think that is how most people see things. People try to draw some kind of parallel between them and what they are seeing. On the other hand, Titanic would be a good example of a film that didn't draw me in. Most of it meant nothing to me.

Saturday's selections included Father's Day, The English Patient and Inventing the Abbots. In my opinion, Father's Day was very weak and not really worth my time. Funny was the furthest thing from my mind. I did like the Paul McCartney song at the beginning of the film though.

I had seen The English Patient in the theater last year, but she had never seen it. I still like it a year later. For me, its a modern version of Doctor Zhivago, another long epic romance complete with world war and forbidden love.

Inventing the Abbots was strange in a good way with its characters rising and falling as we watched. The nineteen fifties always seem so foreign to me. The people seem so stiff and the time period as a whole doesn't seem real to me. Television and movies don't help my confusion.

I guess that I see myself as timeless. I don't think of myself as representative of my generation or anything, because fashion and so many other things just pass me by. Sometimes I wonder if I am missing out on something, but usually I am content to move about within my own little existence. I just see me as me and I am happy with the result. I guess you could label me as a white college educated suburban male with a job in the field of computers, but what does that really say about me. Not much as far as I am concerned, because that just sounds like a marketing demographic to me.

Alan has flattered me once again by creating a second journal styled after mine in some ways. I admire his ability to be able to maintain two different journals at the same time. Now if I was that industrious, I might be able to write a screenplay or something. I think me getting a book published would shatter my little world, because I am still amazed that people read this journal.

This journal has seen me go from whining about how I didn't want another girlfriend to me rambling about how great Brenda is to me. Sad isn't it. No, I just think that it shows how human I really am. I may talk loud, but I'm really quite sensitive at times.

Now that I think about it, this will be my fourth month of writing an online journal. I still have eight months to go before I complete my one year commitment. More than likely I will continue to write even after a year.

I apologize for not updating at my usual time. I think that starting to tomorrow I am going to update as soon as I get home from work. Or I could update the following day after work, so the details from the night don't get lost in the shuffle.