Another Week Ends

The tone of my recent entries has been a little disappointing to me. They have been more haphazard than usual, but in some ways they still reflect my general mood of late. Some of the details have been lost, but I am sure that regular readers can still hack their way through my excuse for prose.

My journal is not what I would call anecdotal. There are some stories, but mostly its just me rambling with little regard for clarity. I like to think that this makes it more unique and is a better picture of me and how I think.

What bothers me is that my writing has failed to create a true picture of Brenda, but that doesn't really surprise me. In the months of this journal's existence, I still wonder how much of me really comes through. On the surface, I might seem to be someone who likes to date married women and has a temper tantrum now and again. Its all a matter of perspective. Friends of mine that read this project know that it is me and can understand what I am trying to say, but can see how a stranger might see it as being very odd.

I did keep her name out of yesterday's entry on purpose to prove that I can go a day without talking about her. I also think that it must be hard on the reader to hear me drone on about someone all of the time.

Being with her is just another example of who I am. All that I need is one person to focus my attention on and I am happy. I don't need to be surrounded by people all of the time, but being with her is different in a good way.

Last night Brenda and I were playing Scrabble. Yes, I am talking about the board game not some sexual innuendo. Yes, we sit around drinking beer and play old fashioned board games instead of hanging out in clubs. Some people might find that weird, but I don't care.

Anyway my point about the game was that she wanted to use the word vroom. A car goes vroom was her example. After some sighing I let her use it, even though I still think at best it might be a slang word.

Now this could make either her or myself seem like a real idiot, but people do goofy things when they are in love or at least I do.

Yes, I did say that we drink. Actually I drink about two beers a night at her house. This might seem strange after all of the ranting I have done about drinking, but it has become part of my routine now. What I mean to say is that as much as I can not stand the bar scene, I have nothing against drinking at home.

Brenda really spoils me. She cooks me supper and won't let me do the dishes. I just sit there and wait for her to finish. Last night was sirloin tips and tonight is baked cod. With all of this beer and food, I am going to start gaining weight if I'm not careful.

Today I wore a shirt to work that Brenda thought was pink, but I knew was more of a peach color. So once again I took another informal survey of the women and asked them what color they would call my shirt. According to the polls, I was right and Brenda was wrong.

Another highlight of last night was the new light bulb in the bathroom. I kept telling her that her bathroom was like a cave. She didn't believe me. Then she put in a brighter bulb and she couldn't believe the difference. If only she would listen to me more often. I highly doubt that this will happen any time soon.

I know I must sound like a complete idiot when it comes to Brenda and I, but I don't care. We have fun together and its been a long time since I felt this good. I should know what is right for me and no one is forcing me to sleep over there every night. We have also worked through the my time issue and computer usage. Wednesday night was my time, because she had to close the store. Unfortunately, I was so pissed that night, I couldn't really enjoy it.

So what does it matter if I like to spend my time with someone who thinks that vroom is a word and used to have a dark bathroom. She also reads the business section of the paper, which I never touch. All of this is just details from my point of view. I am sure that there are people who could site a dozen reasons why we shouldn't be dating, but I don't hear them.

This makes my second light bulb changing entry in the history of my journal. Now that is some exciting stuff.

One thing I am dreading is Valentine's Day. I just do not understand this commercially generated holiday. Presents and surprises have never been something that I am good at doing. If I had my way, I would treat it just like any other day. I know that I owe her something, because she cooks for me all of the time, does my laundry and bought me a leather jacket. I have some catching up to do.

Oh, my new checks came in the mail today. The old set still had the address where Tracy and I lived. This never bothered me. Very seldom do I write checks in public, and I was not about to throw away a set of checks just because they had an old address on them. I'm such a rebel.

The missing entries are still in the works.