|
early memories Short entries like the one for yesterday still bother me, but I had very little to say. My mind was a blank and nothing seemed noteworthy. The frustration of trying to refine a new look for the site, which involved hours of staring at the computer monitor, left me numb. I want the site to be simple yet have a quiet sense of style. The warm days seem to be more frequent now even though they are predicting cold once again later in the week. The recent rain had a definite effect on the surroundings. More green can be seen everyday and the trees are showing signs of life. When the transformation will be complete I can not say, but it must be coming. Today, however, was perfect and it was my weekend so I have no reason to complain. Most of the afternoon was spent outside visiting with my parents with no clouds to mar the sun shining down on us. My niece had her grocery cart filled with groceries and brought it outside with her. I sat at the picnic table as she unpacked the groceries onto the table. Box after box of cookies emerged from the bag in the cart. Each of them was emblazoned with some Nabisco product ranging from Chips Ahoy cookies to Fig Newtons. She would count the boxes and tell me what color they were as she placed them in front of me. I wonder what it must be like to be three years old? What worries if any does she have in her life? What motivates her? Is the world a frightening place or is it magical? I am sure that there are people who say that they can remember things from that age, but I can't. My earliest memories are from kindergarten and most of those are fragmented. Then there are the people who say that they can't remember much of their childhood. I knew a woman who said that she couldn't remember anything before the age of twelve. I found that to be sad and wondered what had caused her to be that way. After some more thought on my part and some discussion with my parents, I have changed my mind about moving. I think that it is better for me stay where I am for another year and save my money. Why nearly double my rent, when I could have enough for a down payment on a house next year. I do not want to buy the house where I live now though. I would much rather own something else in a different location. I guess that I really am an all or nothing kind of person. I can tolerate another year of being where I am now when I know that I will be able to afford a house of my own next year. I do not want to have a transition step of owning a duplex and being a landlord.
|