Michelangelo sibyl from the Sistine Chapel

 

someone to love

In contrast to yesterday, I took most of today at a much slower pace. To put it bluntly I was in no hurry to go anywhere or do anything. Not only did I get a late start on the day by sleeping until ten in the morning, but I didn't even leave the house until three in the afternoon. Then the only reason that I did go outside was to get my laundry that I had left in the car and bring in my new kitchen table. Instead of being constantly on the go, I was almost completely idle and it felt good. For me it balanced out yesterday.

It was one of those days where I really didn't speak to anyone and watched far too much television. The not speaking with anyone part I can handle, but the endless hours of television I kind of regret. I wish that I had read something instead of letting my mind rot for hours on end, but it was certainly one of those days where I was more vegetable than human. I think that most people have those kind of days so I shouldn't be that hard on myself.

Besides calling my parents about the table again, I think I spoke to a total of three people all day long. Not that I knew the three people, since each of them was a clerk somewhere.

The whole day was very self contained with me thinking now and then if I should start to look for a girlfriend, which most of the time I seem to rationalize away. I tell myself that most women wouldn't put up with my work schedule or that I don't have the time to meet anyone new because of it. Then I continue by saying that I am not about to change jobs for some person that I have yet to meet. Then I pause for a moment and admit to myself that I have closed myself off from quite a few things and maybe that should change. It isn't that I mind being alone, but there are times when it would be nice to be seeing someone.

 
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