You know those "tobacco is whacko" commercials? I like one of 'em a lot.

In this one this kid goes down a dark stairwell and down a dank passage. There he's met by a grinning old guy in a lab coat. The old guy proceeds to strap the kid into a chair and pierce the kid's tongue.

"Join me in a cigarette?" the old guy asks.

The kid says, "what? you must be crazy" or something to that effect. Cigarettes bad, kids doing wacky things good, blah blah blah.

But see, I really like the old guy 'cause he's totally cool. Old guy piercers are rare, and his office is completely difficult to get to. And he wears a lab coat! And smokes! I'd so go get pierced by this guy, then have a smoke with him! He rocks!