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making some decisions Despite the length of some of the more recent entries, I've gotten into the habit of forgetting to mention events in the journal. For example, yesterday I got so caught up in the Amanda story that I forgot to mention my thoughts about the lake that also happened on Thursday. Now I feel obligated to insert them here. Whenever I go to class I get to drive along the shore for about five minutes or so depending on the traffic. Now this might be a minor thing for some people, but I still enjoy it. Heading south I get a perfect view of the lake as it stretches out to the horizon. On its way out I can tell that the water is getting deeper by the gradations of color. Along the shore the lake almost looks brown, but in reality what I am seeing is the sand underneath. Soon the sand color gives way to a light shade of blue, then cerulean and then finally a deep blue. It may not be the same as the ocean, but it definitely adds something to the drive. What I should do is bring my camera with me some day and stop to take some photos. Even though the drive to school adds another hundred miles to my weekly total, I don't think that I'll stop. What I mean is that there is another option that I could use. The university offers a bus service from certain pick up points near the edge of the city. Instead of driving twenty-five miles, I could park my car after a seven-mile drive and let the bus take me the rest of the way to school. When I pass that point on my commute, I briefly think that I should try it at least once, but soon change my mind. I like being able to control when and where I am going. Taking the bus would limit my options and put me on someone else's schedule. I see that as a negative. Besides saving gas there is another positive to going with the bus option. If I rode the bus, I'd probably get to know some new people since this isn't a public bus where people keep to themselves, but is strictly for college students. Then again maybe people just sleep on the bus. I don't know. Maybe I'll give it a try after spring break. Right now the negative is outweighing the positive. ... I have yet to hear from Ann since she left the state. I like to think that she has just been incredibly busy trying to get things sorted out than her just putting everything that she knew in Wisconsin behind her. Hopefully I'll hear from her soon. ... After the comparison-shopping that I did on Wednesday, I went out and brought my final choices this morning after work. Since I work third shift I was literally there as the doors opened on one of the stores. In fact I got to see what I like to call the morning pep rally at two different retail chains this morning. In somewhat of a semi-circle will be a group of employees chatting about the day and maybe discussing strategy. At least I think that that is what they are doing. Personally I find all of it to be silly. ... In my best overly melodramatic voice, I am ready to start to set things in motion. Yes, I've started looking for a new job. The resume has been updated and I have a couple of places in mind where I might be qualified and or welcomed. Now I realize if I left now, my current department would be devastated by my departure, but that really isn't my problem. Why should I pass up a significant increase in salary and vacation time just to stay where I am and not rock the boat? In my mind this is what is best for me and the last time that I checked I am the most important person in my life. Work may have to struggle for a few months since they were the ones who built the house of cards, but I know that I'll be much happier.
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