low level threat

My final hour at work this morning was not a pleasant one. In fact by the time that I got home I felt as though I had been over medicated or drank far too many extremely caffeinated drinks in one sitting. My stomach was less than happy and the idea of food was unappealing. All that I could do was keep replaying a conversation in my head over and over again and that prevented me from doing much of anything else. Let me explain.

With less than two hours left in my day, I went to visit with Nicole when her fiance came by as were talking and said that we needed to talk. As soon as he said those words, I could guess at some of the content of the upcoming conversation.

Nothing was said as we were making our way up the stairs and heading towards the cafeteria. Then as we approached the last door he took a deep breath and said he didn't know how to say want he was going to say.

I can't remember the exact words, but basically what he said is that he wanted me to stay away from Nicole. According to him I was upsetting her and she was too scared to tell me herself. I was getting too close to her and it was making her nervous around me. He even went so far as to say that she was afraid to be alone with me.

Hearing him say those things hurt me, angered me and confused me all at the same time.

Was he telling the truth?

Why didn't she say anything to me herself?

He said that she isn't as outgoing as I think. She stays at home and cries about coming to work. She'd rather call in Sunday night then be by me.

Then there would be a pause and he would back pedal and say that I was a good person and that she thought of me as a friend, but that I was getting too close. People had seen me with her and there had been talk. That talk made her nervous about being at work. They had seen us do things that bothered him. We were being watched.

Eventually he left and I sat there for a moment trying to understand what he had said and whether any of it was true. Naturally I couldn't run back to Nicole and ask. There needed to be some kind of a break between us first. Besides I imagine that he would be watching more closely than ever before.

For a moment I almost wish that he had hit me instead of talking to me. It would have been easier to understand.

It made me sad to hear him paint her as this emotionally troubled person. A person that didn't want to be around me. It went against my image of her and I was shocked. I like to think that I know her better and that she could say something to me herself. Of course he had to poison my belief by saying that there were things that I didn't know about her. Something bad had happened to her when she was eighteen and then he would trail off.

Maybe this makes me sound psychotic. Maybe he is psychotic. All that I know for certain is that my morning was ruined and he was the cause.

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